I’ve been having quite a time dealing with my nine year old daughter this summer. It’s too the point that I don’t want to think about it. My heart just aches. I just want it to stop. No, she’s not getting into trouble. She’s not too sassy. She is a good student. It’s just that she is…I don’t want to say it…..She is…. growing up.
For the past nine years, she has been my little girl. Although not always ribbons and curls, her clothes, her toys, her actions have always been that of a little girl. I have been able to shield her from experiences, ideas and people that she was not ready to handle. She has always been simply too young for many things, so it has been easy to keep her sheltered and innocent.
This summer, I have noticed a change. That petite little girl has gotten so much taller. Her scrawny legs have developed muscles that are so much stronger and more coordinated than ever before. The sweet baby face is maturing. Those looks are looks of curiosity. Not the curiosity and wonderment of a little one seeing her first shooting star. She has the look that says, “I’m putting it together. I’m not sure what I’m putting together, but I want to know!”
She is leaving the innocence behind and entering a new world. The world of in between. In between a little girl and an young woman. In between dolls and IPODs. In between baby lotion and make-up. In between needing me for everything to thinking she doesn’t need me at all.
Of course, my daughter is excited. Excited to be growing up and being able to do new things. Me? Not so much. I still want to cuddle her up in my lap, but her long legs won’t fit anymore. I want to tell her “No” because she is still little and not because I just want to protect her. I want to choose her friends and her toys and everything else!!
It’s not important what I want. I can’t stop her from growing up and I can’t live her life for her. But, I can give her the tools and the love necessary to make this transition easier on both of us. While I might not have a little girl anymore, I can be excited about the young woman my daughter is becoming. So, as soon as my total denial that she is really growing up fades, I’ll get right on that!
I think I did pretty well with my older two growing up but now my baby is nine I am really struggling. It’s like she just need me enough. I get scolded when I call her the baby, moaned at when I won’t allow her to do what her sisters do. It’s hard letting go. Like your daughter she isn’t sassy it’s just the fact that she is growing up is hurting my heart.
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I, too, have a nine-year-old daughter who seems to be growing up right before my eyes. I love the moments when she’s still a little girl, playing with her younger sister, cuddling up close to me. I know those moments will get fewer and farther between in the coming years, so am trying to enjoy each one now!
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Oh…. this is hard. My son is 9 and I’m experiencing some of the same things with him, but my daughter, who is 7, has also entered this fast and furious growing up stage. It’s so bittersweet. There was a time when I thought it would never end – the total dependence on me – but now that the end is in sight, I’m thinking it wasn’t so bad afterall.
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My older daughter turned 9 this summer, and I can definitely relate to this post, especially since my “baby” will be starting kindergarten next month!
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Oh my Marci, this just brought tears to my eyes! Seriously. I. Am. Crying. My daughter is only 3.5 and I can only imagine when she goes through the changes you are describing. Just thinking about them makes my heart ache. My husband and I have been watching her the month and shaking our heads over the changes we are seeing. Different then you describe, but still a growing up stage. I wonder if her being our only child and our secondary infertility struggles make it even harder watching her grow. Praying for all the mothers out there watching their babies grow up. I definitely can understand why my mom got teary eyed driving me to take my daugther to her 1 week old checkup. She was driving her baby and only daughter, who was now a mom. I. CAN. NOT. IMAGINE her thoughts.
Thank you for such a beautifully written post!
Oh…this one makes my heart hurt. I can see my oldest becoming a young lady and not a baby anymore. It’s so hard to watch!
I know that they are only mine to keep for a little while. When it comes to my girls growing up…I’m all about denial.
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Marci, I can so identify with you right now! I am noticing so many changes in my daughter this year – she’s only 6.5, but she is definitely starting to make the switch from a “little girl” to one well on her way to growing up. I’m not ready for it all, but I am trying to find ways to encourage her personal growth and maturity without allowing it all to happen too fast!
I can relate to this post as my daughter will be 8 in exactly 1 month. I still can’t believe she’s going into 3rd grade. It scares me think of the things her ears may hear & her eyes may see this coming year. This brings me to the question of when/if you’ve had the “birds/bees talk” w/ your 9 year old? This is something I’ve struggled w/ in knowing when…and although each child is different…I am just wondering if other moms have & what age they did.
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Thank you – I needed to cry my eyes out again today. This was a beautiful post and totally hit my heart. My little girl turned 4 last week and….well, I cried the entire week. Cried as I remembered her first cry, first steps, first words, her little baby giggles. Oh it was tough. For me, so similar to you, it was the realization that there was this transition occurring before my eyes and there was nothing I could do to stop it – my little baby was growing up so quickly. I am much better know and embracing the wonders of her just as I always have. Nine will be here soon enough. Bless you and all of the moms out there as we strive to protect out babies, shelter them from the world yet let them grow and make a difference in it.
This is the first time to this blog and I am marking it on my list of reads.
Thank you!!!